Goodbye

I got a very early morning phone call from one of my aunts last Tuesday and she informed me that my grandmother had passed away.

Initially I felt sad and grieved over her death, but as the day passed and the more I thought about the circumstances in which she had gone, the more I see things differently. She's lived to a ripe, old age of 94 dying peacefully in her sleep, virtually free of disease - no hypertension, no diabetes, normal cholesterol levels, no 'fong sap' and is a great grandmother many times over. Most of us will be lucky to achieve that these days. When my plane touched down in Penang that night I had fully accepted the fact and was ready to move on.

The only regret that I have is that I didn't get to know her better. There was this massive language barrier, us with our laughable command of hokkien, we probably sounded to her like Phua Chu Kang talking 'engrish' with a foreigner. We knew her through our parent's stories of her days back in China and all, but conversations between us were few. The only words I remember her directly addressing to us the grandchildren were to 'study hard and succeed in life.'

There are no excuses though. Language is a barrier yes, but not insurmountable. My wife, ever a beacon of support, summed it very nicely by saying in her consolation that there may be regrets but its time to move on holding the important people in our lives closer. I couldn't agree more.